Okay, I give. You win. I'm beat! Is that what you want?

That is the question I want to ask my Athletic Director. He sold me out today. Here's the story:

Thursday, player A skips school and practice so she can baby sit her brother. Does her brother normally go to Daycare? Yes, she just decided to do this. So what happens? She can't play in Friday's game. Team policy: no practice before a game, no game. Player A bitches, moans and whines. She's a senior and one of my captians; this isn't news to her.

Monday: Player M skips class and now I have to kick her off the team. Player B almost gets into a fight and is suspended for two days and one game. Player D tells me she won't be at practice because she has a dr's appt and can't play because she's hurt. News to me. Then Player A comes to me and tells me that she isn't coming to practice because she has a job interview. My assistant coach told Player A that she'd meet her after the interview, run a practice with her so that she'd be elligible to play in the game the next day. Oh, and my assistant, coach J, did this WITHOUT consulting me. So coach J and I have it out because she decides it's time to tell me that I'm a horrible coach and she disagrees with pretty much everything I do.

Tuesday morning: I talk to my athletic direction (A.D.) and he totally supported me and told me not to start Player A, but to play her. He told me not to start her even though it was the senior's last home game. Game starts in a complete down pour. Well, she got pissed and left 10 minutes into the game. My AD's response was that she made her choice and had quit the team.

Today: Coach J comes in and tosses Player A's uniform at me and said she quit. I said she made that abuntantly clear and that was fine because she was done in my book anyway. Coach J starts to rip on me for not starting. I go off because I was following my AD's directive. I email AD and he tells me that Coach J and Player A need to both fess up to their mistakes and pull their heads out. He's tired of Player A's attitude that she is better than everyone else and that she needs to apologize to me and to the team. By the end of the day, his support had changed to once she apologizes, I have to let her back on the team.

So now I'm here with no apology, a snotty player who thinks she won, a team that is confused, and no authority whatsoever. I atleast still have her uniform and she has to apologize before I give it to her. Plus I have the power to put her ass on the bench.

In the end, my letter of resignation will be on my athletic director's desk at 7:15 tomorrow morning, affective at 5:30, the conclusion of our game. I feel like crap about the whole thing and feel like player A has not learned anything through this experience except that if she bitches and moans loud enough, she gets her way.

I know in the end, this is nothing. This is so insiginificant. I just feel like what I have tried to build in the last 4 years is dissolving quickly. However, I have my health, my family, my husband, and my baby.

This is nothing. This is a chapter of my life that I am closing. A bad season does not erase the good I have done, the lives I have affected, or the kids I have helped.

In closing, I'm moving on, but want to say. Go to hell Player A. Coach J, I hope you learn so maturity in a hurry. AD, you have lost my respect completely!

Now I'm done!