What is wrong with me?

I think part of it has to do with last week's passing of Hannah, but I was doing it before too.

I have this sick habit of my mind wandering and imagining all the horrible things that can happen to the girls or J.

For example: I have this HUGE fear of driving over bridges because I'm afraid that we'll go over the side and into the water and I won't be able to get both girls out in time. Since Jana started walking and now running, I have this awful fear of her falling on something and seriously hurting herself. When we go out walking or running, I am afraid of someone hitting us with their car or being attacked by a dog. I'm deathly afraid of our dog attacking Jana. This last one is pretty irrational, but since the 4th when Maiya was bitten by another dog and her latest growling/moaning at Jana when Jana falls on her or tries to get around her and pushes her, I'm totally afraid of it.

I try not to let it bother me too much, but they are these very vivid daydream-like images in my head. I think we're going to get into a car accident every time we get in the car and the girls will get hurt.

It's not like a full-blown panic attack, but it's this little knot in the bottom of my stomach.

I had this with Jana too, but it seems to be worse this time because I have the two of them to worry about. I also have these horrible images of how I try to survive if I lost J.

I seriously don't know what is wrong with me. It's not like it's all-consuming, but when I have nothing else on my mind and some quiet time, they come back.

Ugh! I feel like a nut case!